You're textbook successful but you don't feel it.
You look around you at all you've created, called in and acquired and it's everything you said you wanted.
So, why don't you F-ing FEEEEL it?
Why don't you FEEL the success you're supposed surrounded by and have evidence of. Instead of having the most magnificent, cheshire cat grin on your face, you feel E M P T Y.
I can tell you why and I can tell you you're not alone.
I've just come down from a high of speaking to an intimate room of 30 women about this and so much more on Wednesday night at Passion, Power, Purpose hosted by Future Females Brisbane.
The reason why you don't feel successful is because you based your definition of success on what your head can measure and you're using mis-directed fear as the motivator.
You've set things up so that you can...
Tick boxes off lists
Have an Excel spreadsheet operate as proof
Depend upon external validation
Use others success/perceived lack of success as a yardstick measure of your own
Have an aesthetic prove your success - your house, your holidays, your wardrobe, your pretty socials
(Psssst. Want to listen to the rest? The directors cut of this article is available as episode 74 of much-loved podcast The Secrets Women Keep.)
What I've listed above are the OLD Alpha ways of grasping your success. Like a set of fabulous shoulder pads in the 80's gave women a swift dopamine hit of punchy power, we've since learnt and elevated above this.
The new femme waves of leadership measure success in totally different ways.
In fact, in the new femme waves of leadership, success isn't even measured. It's experienced. It's all subjective and qualitative. Personal.
Throw. Out. The. Yardstick.
Delete the excel spreadsheet.
Quit one-upping your high school friends just because you need an ego boost.
There's a revolution underway - the new femme waves decree that success is...
How intimately you know yourself and love on all the parts of you
How powerful and empowered you feel to make your own decisions on a daily basis
Being completely unavailable and uncontactable to restore your vitality
The degree of enjoyment you experience being in your body
The quality with which you allow yourself to completely decompress
The standards that you hold for your relationships, interactions and dynamics
The building of wealth, true wealth and abundance that is supportive of you and your mission AND generous in that it spreads to other marginalised people
The vigour with which you support other women
There's MORE. If you have your own, add them to the above ever-evolving, shapeshifting ideals.
In case you've forgotten...
You are already successful. It's an internal decision.
You already are the thing and the one you've been waiting for.
There is nothing external to you that can affirm that in the way you desire. Nothing.
You being present in this world as the one in 8 billion that you are is everything and more.
You'll know on your deathbed that you were successful not because of what you acquired but who you were - loving, open, powerful, adventurous, courageous, trailblazing...
It's never too late to change your definition of success.
It's never too late to allow yourself to receive the guidance you require to not only understand all this through your head but integrate into your body what these new femme waves are. These waves...they are much bigger than a ripple and when they are felt, seismic shifts occur.
I am here for this.
If you need a reminder of what I do behind closed doors, I ignite the leaders who are here to multiply their reach in new and exhilarating ways to create concentric circles of impact beyond belief.
I ignite the ones that know that when I work with them, the work is inevitably felt by thousands.
When you work on you, for you, everyone benefits.
To be at the helm of the new revolution, the only way is to surrender to being guided first.
Always in your corner,
Lauren xo