You get aroused, really aroused. You try and try and try to reach that peak and cascade into pleasure and you keep climbing with no drop. You feel REALLY good but never amazing! fantastic! or relieved of your sexual tension. Alternatively, you may have had orgasm before but have not been able to feel it again or you haven’t had one at all.

Orgasm difficulties are the persistent or recurrent difficulty, delay in or absence of attaining orgasm after sufficient sexual stimulation and arousal, which causes personal distress. There is a lot that can happen in the space between sexual arousal and orgasm and because this is our own experience, we can be blindsided to what gets in the way.

Some women also feel a particular amount of pressure to have an orgasm with penetration – something that has become elusive and shrouded with misinformation (and isn’t statistically common). If negative expectations and stress accompany sex, this can separate women further from feeling or experiencing orgasm because sex becomes more about achieving a goal and takes us out of our sexual bodies and into our heads.

The good news is that feeling orgasmic energy is possible for all humans; it just may not be in the traditional way that it is depicted in the media or through conversations with friends. With a bit of education, information, guidance and support, getting closer to your orgasmic potential needn’t be stressful or scary. By talking to a qualified female sexologist about your sexual functioning, we can start to unravel what is getting in the way of succumbing to sexual pleasure so that you can finally let go.