Sex isn’t everything in a relationship but when it is bad or crap…well, it starts to become pretty darn important. Now, it may not be a reflection of you two as a couple - more a reflection of bad habits. Deep breath before you read this one - it’s a truth talk extravaganza. I’m getting real with you about some of the reasons why your relationship might not outlast the bad sex that’s happening.
This time around, we aren’t going to talk about the why’s or the what happened’s that got you in a place of low libido, low desire and low interest although, those are important. Today, we are going to talk about 5 things you can do to break the ice when it has been a long time since you had sex. Totally realistic and totally gentle, I promise.
The people who make the best givers are those who know how to receive. Yup, I stand by that! Last weeks blog was ALL about receiving and getting to a much better place with that. Now, I want women to create better boundaries and containers around their giving so that it comes from a much healthier, less martyr-mode driven place. This one is important.
You’ve shutdown in and about sex more times than you can remember. There may have been a pivotal moment you’ll never forget or maybe it was this gradual disconnection that happened over time. Each factor compounding the last. Whatever the origin, I want to give you permission to open and move out of sexual shutdown…
I get asked this on a regular basis - surely by now there is some sort of pill a woman can take when she feels her libido could be more. In this video, I explain why I am glad there isn't a pill for the female libido and what else you can do to enhance presence and arousal. Refreshingly, your body already has all the answers...
Is there a connection there? I reckon there is! When women get clear on their worth and on the money that comes into their lives, they get more comfortable within their sexual expression because their bodies aren’t in fear and contraction. When the money and worth flows nicely, so too does the sexual energy…
They have a HIGH libido and I have none.
Words I have heard a bazillion times but simply aren’t true. Can you hear me? They aren’t true! This one is for both of you: how you can feel your libido when you are out of touch with it and how your partner with the “higher” libido can meet you in more ways than sexually. This is an important read.
Whenever we crave a fresh start, our sexuality isn't the first place we usually start. Unfortunately, it usually gets relegated to the 'I'll deal with it later pile'. This is a shame because looking inward at our sexuality and libido can treat the rest of our problems with such potent medicine and make our personal growth to-do list a whole lot smaller.
Today, I invite you to ask if your libido can be a part of your fresh start (and I'll give you some tips to do that!)
Ahhh satisfaction - that sweet end point where we hunger no more.
But how do we know when we feel it? How do we know when we have arrived?
Only you can answer that one so if you are feeling like frustration is ruling your bedroom and satisfaction is nowhere to be seen, read this one to make sure you aren't accidentally overlooking your sexual satisfaction (it could well be right in front of you!)
The only way you can even think to describe your sex drive is that it is low or non-existent. The only way you can even begin to describe your interest in sex is that there isn't any. But you love your partner (if you have one) and you really want to say goodbye to these persistent blocks that prevent you from feeling intimate and into IT. Deep breath, this is a deep journey into your sex drive and interest in sex. Read it all and feel yourself already walking away from inhibition and being checked-out of your own personal life.
When women come and see me in sessions, I am very aware of the fact that (if she is in a relationship) that I am also, in some ways, seeing her partner in sessions as well…without actually seeing him. We women have created some habits that we need your support to shift. There's so much we want men to know about us but we get stuck with how to tell you. So today, I am playing translator to let men know how they can support their female partner when it feels like she is checking out of their sex life.
I’m coming to you today from my bedroom! I thought I would speak to you today about the power of your bedroom and the importance of it…the importance of having a sexual space that is really aligned with being sexual and it might sound weird but it's an important piece that heaps of women overlook. They start to think that they can just have sex in any old space and that it won't affect the quality or the satisfaction that they receive from their sexual interactions with their partners. But for women, nothing could be further from the truth.
(TIME LIMITED OFFER INSIDE THE BLOG!!)
That first year after birth is a strange time for sex and intimacy. There is such a broad range of experiences BUT a lot of common themes. This blog is the pure permission granter for not much to happen in the bedroom after you have a baby and the reasons why. If all of this goes over your head, just take this away - you can be sexual and a mother (truth).
There is some truly excellent news about sexual frustration that you must know. The best news about sexual frustration is that you are alive and that you have a libido. Your frustration means you care enough about your sexual feelings that this feeling of being separated from your mojo actually causes pain. Frustration is the tension that informs you that you are not using your power to its full capacity.
You both know that it's been a while. A long while. The absence of sex looms in the space between you on the couch, milling in the kitchen, brushing your teeth in the bathroom and most obviously in the bed you share. You can't recall the last time you had sex and if you do, it was a drunken tryst - an anomaly in the pattern of your predictability as a twosome.